Three years ago my husband, daughters and I agreed to let a perfect stranger live with us for a month. Her name was Carmen, a 16 year old from Spain. We never believed hosting a foreign exchange student to be possibility, especially in that point in time with two young kids. It was enough to let friends and family into our messy, chaotic lives let alone someone we’d never met with a language difference to boot.

A Call for Help

As life is want to do, we get moved in directions we didn’t think we could go. One late spring day, email posted on the DC Celiacs listserve looking for a host family for a 16 year girl from Madrid. She was enrolled in an exchange program but her parents were looking for a host family that was gluten free or had someone with Celiac that could keep her safe. Before I knew it, I had connected with the program stateside. As I read her handwritten letter, written in English, it was clear this was a fun, passionate teen who hoped to go to medical school and help sick kids.

My Heart Took Over

With her beautiful young face staring back at me, my heart took over. I ignored my head yelling “we have a 2 week beach vacation planned, we have to drive her miles to outings, etc. I reached out to families in the Cel-Kids Maryland group and another family (with heart overriding logistics) stepped up share the hosting month.

Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

FOMO is a word that has only recently entered into the American lexicon. It wasn’t around 7 years ago when my daughter was diagnosed but perfectly sums up my biggest fear (aside from heath issues) about the diagnosis. Although I never pictured my homebody daughter with celiac wanting to go abroad with her family, imagining her not being able to, if she so chose, was heartbreaking. Celiac was something she would have to live with forever but I hated the thought of it defining or limiting her opportunities. My heart connected with Carmen’s parents in Spain, imagining they wished the same but putting their daughter’s health above everything.

Bad News and Good News

After many communications with the hosting organization (and them with their Spanish counterpart), we were unable to host Carmen. Because the stateside program was based in No. Virginia and us in Baltimore, we weren’t close enough to have regular contact with Carmen. I was extraordinarily sad imagining her disappointment and feeling as if it were my own daughter’s missed opportunity. I longed to reach out to her personally and offer our house but her contact info was confidential.

These memories came flooding back as the email crossed my inbox from Xplore, a UK based company offering student travel and language programs. They had connected with the Gluten Intolerance Group (GIG) and Generation Next to offer travel and exchange opportunities to students with celiac and gluten intolerance. I was surprised at how quickly the FOMO feelings came rushing back followed by a gratitude that ground had been broken.

My daughter may never have the desire to travel out of the continental US but the fact that her celiac disease won’t dictate her boundaries means the world to this Mom.